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Showing posts with label Behavior. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Behavior. Show all posts

2012-08-26

Tips for overcoming tantrums and rages

sad-child

The tantrum is a normal reaction of children to frustration, but should be corrected as soon as possible

Drops to the floor, kicking and screaming nonstop. Tantrums and tantrums in response to some kind of frustration occur more or less frequently in children between two and four years. This attitude, which can waste many parents nerves, more if it takes place in a public space, should be corrected as soon as possible to prevent it from becoming a weapon in the hands of children to achieve what they want.

Which should tantrums

Tantrums are one of the resources used by children between two and four years to express their frustration with different circumstances, either because something does not go as expected for not having the necessary skills, because it prevents them from doing what they want, are cansandos or not answer all their demands as required.

The tantrum includes, usually screaming, crying, kicking, and even some real shots. So therefore causes nervousness and impaired parents. If above is triggered in a public place and little bother other people with your attitude, the situation can become embarrassing.

Can avoid tantrums?

notes that these situations are not something unusual: "You have to give, since children do these things because not count what happens." So the psychologist notes that the work of parents is to "guide their behavior and teach the child that this is not the right way to express your anger, fatigue or discomfort."

The aim should be that the child understands that even with tears or with kicking things are achieved. Thus, the main premise that parents must address is not yieldIe, not give in and give him what he asks for and prove that their strategy is not working and that the next time you use it will be the same.

Strategies to minimize tantrums
  • Ignore: ignorance can be successful with a tantrum because the child knows that if he does not have public notice, its effect is nil. If the tantrum takes place at home, simply leave the room where is the child, not without telling you that attitude is inappropriate and will be back when finished. If you are in a public space, you can give back to young to realize that you do not get anything with the tantrum or move to another place, in the event that significantly disturb people around you.
  • The power of words: reason with a child in the midst of a tantrum is a mission impossible, is not likely to hear anything of what they say. However, once you finish the tantrum, you must small talk with about what happened and show that things can be solved in different ways to complain. If the next time the child chooses to dialogue rather than the tantrum, it is essential to congratulate.
  • Avoid dangerous situations: abusing children tantrums tend to intensify in certain situations, such as when they are tired or hungry. Savvy parents can avoid this situation if the above symptoms in your children go to bed and let them rest awhile or feed them at the right time.
  • Better safe: knowledge of their children's reactions can help parents prevent tantrums situations. If you know that with a determined refusal order or the child will respond with a temper tantrum, you should anticipate and try to reason with them before. If you will go to a store where candy and know that the baby kicks if he is not buying everything he asks, before entering, you can "negotiate" with the little that you just buy a treat and that, if tantrum will not get any.
Four essential tips
  1. Given a tantrum, both parents must respond equally. If one gives, the strategies do not prove effective.
  2. It should stay calm and not get angry and yell. Thus, just get the child to see that parents emulate his attitude.
  3. Apologize to the people upset with your child tantrum and do everything possible to minimize this discomfort.
  4. Reinforce positive attitudes and gestures of affection reward and recognition when the child alone avoid the tantrums and act appropriately to a frustration.

2012-08-23

Early Childhood Education: What is the best way of praising and scolding? 10 Keys to educate your child!

10-Keys-to-educate-your-child
10 Keys to educate your child

Education is one of the most difficult tasks facing us parents. And, although there are no magic formulas, yes there are some key issues that we have to handle with ease. Never too early to start educating you. These are the basic rules to ensure that your child grows up happy.


1. An example is worth a thousand sermons

From the very small children tend to imitate all our behaviors, good and bad.
We can use the daily customs -As greeting, behave at the table, respect the rules Driving-to acquire correct habits and, little by little, take responsibility.
It is no use lecturing always the same story if their Parents do not do what they ask.

2. Communication, dialogue, understanding?

Words, gestures, looks and expressions we use help us to know each other better and to express all that we feel. So even during the pregnancy There which baby talk.
We must always continue communication. Talking much, unhurried, tell stories and let him be who we count them.
Have you tried to ask a question that starts with "What do you think about ...?" Thus we show that we value your opinion and he will feel loved and heard.

3. Limits and discipline, without threats

Must teach separate feelings of action. The standards must be clear and coherent and logical explanations accompanied.
They have to know what happens if you do not do what we ask. For example, we must make it clear that after play has to pick up their toys.
It is important that the child-and us-to understand that their feelings are not the problem, but the misconduct. And to them should always set limits, because there are other areas negotiable and which are not. If he refuses to go to school, We have to recognize how annoying it is to get up early and tell sometimes we do too.

4. Leave her experience even mistake

The best way for children to explore the world is let them experience things themselves. And if they are wrong, we have to be there to care for them physically and emotionally, but with limits.
The overprotection Sometimes parents protect us from certain fears, but not our son. If every time you fall or get hit, no matter how small, we are alarmed to assist him, we will be encouraging him to the complaint and accustomed to continuous comfort. We have to let them take risks.

5. Do not compare or disqualification

We must eliminate phrases like "learn from your brother" "When you get to be as responsible as your cousin?" Or "you're so whiny as that kid in the park."
Should not generalize and we must dispense with expressions like "you're always hitting your sister" or "If you never do."
Sure that does many things well, But lately is behaving like a real "junk". Each child is unique, not all act the same rate and in the same way.
Phrases like "you can swim just as well as your brother, try. You'll see " transform their discomfort on a smile and encourage you to achieve your goals.

6. Sharing our experiences with other parents

It can be very useful. So live a rebellious stage of our son, Something very common at certain ages, may cease to be a source of tremendous anxiety and become just a passing phase but tough. Phrases like "do not worry, my son was having the same" can help us to relativize the 'problems' and therefore make us feel better and act more relaxed.
If we are confused, worried or do not know how to act, we can always consult a professional. We have nothing to lose.

7. We must recognize our mistakes

We are entitled to make mistakes and that does not mean we are bad parents. The important thing is to acknowledge mistakes and use them as a source of learning.
A simple phrase like "sorry honey, reinforces good behavior and helps us feel good.

8. Reinforce the good things

It is proven that positive reinforcement gestures of affection, encouragement, rewards are more effective in educating the punishment. So we should always give emotional support and let's him that, according to his ability, to solve the problems.


Children are very sensitive and adjectives like "stupid" or "bad" I do a lot of damage and can negatively affect the valuation they have of themselves.
We must be generous with everything that makes them feel valued and loved. If we reward him with caresses, hugs or words like "handsome" or "ready", we are building a good self-esteem.


Equally important to rectify their misconduct is to recognize and reinforce good.

9. Do not pretend to be your friends

Although always useful to promote a climate of closeness and trust, that does not mean we should be best friends.


While dealing with children is as equals, we as Parents and educators, we are located at a higher step. From there we offer our care, experience, protection? but also our standards.


Search continues for all approval can be a double-edged sword, And that friendship is also admiration and confidence and it is very difficult to trust us if we do not impose.


A good father not one who gives continuously and not taught.

10. They also have emotions

Sometimes we think only we feel disgruntled and that children need to be happy all day. But they also have concerns.
His emotional world is equally or more complex than ours, why should give importance to their emotions and be aware of them. We must help to put our son first and last name to what he experiences and feels.

What is the best way of praising and scolding?

Many parents wonder if punishments are effective or continually praising the achievements of the children do not become smug people. Our counselor, psychologist Luciano Montero, answers these questions.


Praise is used to educate primarily sincere

The praise is the best educational tool. We speak of praise timely, adequate, timely, well dosed and administered ... But also sincere, ie "senses" by whom says.

Receiving care behaviorsWhich find an echo, tend to increaseWhile those found with emptiness and silence in response tend to disappear.

When we praise our children not only help them feel better and develop their esteem But we are developing their qualities and strengths.

But do not happen that praise children become little monsters in vain? The answer is no, provided they are implemented in a timely and measuredWithin a balanced teaching style, which are present also standards, The bounds, Consideration and respect others. A strong self-esteem, not "inflated" based on self-acceptance is rather a vaccine against pride.

But beware. What gives value to praise the love and good intentions. It is not handling the child making him the ball. If you try to infuse praise aspirations that exceed or a disproportionate requirements, we just attacking healthy self-esteem. O if its a cold manipulative strategy, then the praise is a kind of poison depersonalizing.


To be effective, praise must:

  • Be sincere and spontaneous (Not contrived or used to manipulate and blackmail).
  • His intensity and form must be consistent with the achievement or to praise good behavior (ie, not superficial or exaggerated).
  • Describe the behavior that is praised, because that multiplies its effectiveness"What has been nice all afternoon with your brother, playing with him," instead of just "what have you done well."
  • Dose: neither too many nor too few.
Quarrel to educate

The scolding must have an educational purpose, not merely irrational outpouring of parents.

Better scold time. Nothing to hold the eleventh ten pranks and do pay all together with a disproportionate anger.

No disqualify globally. We can say: "Do not remove the sticker to your brother" or "you have to look at the curb," but not "You're wrong", "you're a clumsy", "lazy" or "stupid". These labels do not give clues to the child about what should change and what is more dangerous, are incorporated into the concept that is being formed of himself, which eventually behaving in accordance with them.

It is best not to scream. Parents who do not change are best assert their authority.

Prohibited compare. Nothing "learn from your brother." A child will show if you stimulate greater willingness to overcome. The comparisons create resentment, lower self-esteem and rarely lead to a real improvement.

Do not threaten in vain. By saying "if you do what I tell you do not go in three months," the threat is so unrealistic, it is not credible. If you ever used a threat of a punishment must be realistic and also must be met: "If you come back to play with the ball indoors it off to you all afternoon."

No desautorizarse between father and mother. Mom can ever lift a punishment imposed dad and this make "blind eye". This is no catastrophe. But if the authority is not clearly defined and the rules, the child may even learn to maneuver to confront their parents, and often rebel as habits develop respect and obedience.

Do not get into endless arguments. When corrected must give an explanation, but that does not mean entering a endless strife. Following the reasoning, it is better to be firm.

Activities for children with aggressive attitudes ,How to reduce your child's aggression? Ways to manage aggressive behaviors

Activities for children with aggressive attitudes

Ways_to_manage_aggressive_behaviors

Children of all ages can show sometime aggressive attitudes. Its causes include factors ranging from genetics, through parenting behaviors, to the community culture. With these attitudes boys try not to hurt anyone, but it can be annoying to others. Here are some activities for children with aggressive attitudes.

Activities to help children with aggressive attitudes
 
Sport

Sports provide a healthy way for children to release their aggressiveness without hurting anyone. This activity teaches the importance of teamwork and fair play. Moreover, the sport allows children to learn impulse control and to practice the discipline.

Physical exercises channeled aggression in nondestructive ways. They can choose a team sport, like football or baseball, or a martial art that helps them develop self-control, like karate.

Meditation

Take the children with aggressive attitudes to meditation is a way to calm them when they are out of control. Many methods of meditation can help kids, including relaxation and those that include the use of imagination.

Teach your child to clear his mind and breathing slowly counting to 10 when you feel out their aggression. Show him how we think about things calm when we feel overwhelmed and irritable. You can then apply these teachings in everyday life.

Art

Children with aggressive attitudes often have difficulty express their feelings. It is often what causes his untimely act. They may feel that alter emotions and do not know how to channel that information. Well, kids can use art to bring to the surface those feelings.

Through painting, sculpture, music and other arts, can convey their emotions. It is also a way for parents to understand the origin of the aggressiveness. When your child is angry, encourage him to paint or express their feelings through art, rather than acting physically.

Volunteer

The aggressive boys are often filled with anger, even if their lives are positive. There is a good way to get rid of these children anger: encourage them to volunteer in community or charitable work. When small faced with the harsh reality of many people in the world, very often understand that they have no need to be upset, we really are lucky.

On the other hand, do something good for the weakest can raise self-esteem and give the child a more positive perspective.

Any child may have aggressive attitudes at any time of life. The important thing is to help them channel those negative energies using healthy activities that allow them to express their emotions and become better people.

How to reduce your child's aggression?

The aggressiveness is in us, more in some than others, but everyone can develop as well as we can manage. When a child begins to show aggressive behaviors is a complex situation, as teachers, peers, parents, and even family, can turn against us and claim for their behavior. Therefore, here we give you tools so you know how to reduce your child's aggression.
 
Meet the situation

The first thing to do is to know your child, see how aggressive situations behaves, how he shows his anger and how many times you do so you can evaluate what is happening. You should also identify the emotions they feel your son, if you have anger, frustration, anxiety, irritability, etc.., See what raw emotion and how it is triggered.

For example, can a classmate what is bothering your child is continually exploited by not knowing what to do with that pressure, or that something is happening that you do not like and it shows with aggressiveness. Talk to your child and ask what is happening, what you feel, without rebuke, only Hear.
 
It uses a specialist

First visit to your doctor and tell him what's going on. Maybe your child has a disease that keeps him irritable, or you may have a condition that affects your emotions. If the problem persists it will be necessary to see a psychologist, or a psychiatrist even, the point is to help your child to feel good and can get along with others.

Work with your child

As a parent will have much work to do to help your child improve his aggressiveness problem. You'll have to set up a behavior plan, where you have to determine what pattern you will use in their teaching, as the punishments and rewards that you'll apply and when.

Teach your child to handle

Teach your child self-control and relaxation techniques, for example, breathe slowly when you feel out of control, or you walk away from the situation for a while and reward him when he does. It is important to remember to lead by example, so if you know you control, it will be easier for your child to learn to do.

Ways to manage aggressive behaviors

Above saw some advice to help the little ones do not have aggressive behaviorsWhich, although part of their natural development is the responsibility of parents set limits for that aggression does not become manifest in the way.

Teach alternatives to get what we want is a way for them to understand that aggression is not achieved anything. After he calms discuss what happened, ask him to explain that he wanted to achieve with his attitude.

Make emphasize that normal feel angry from time to time, but it is not OK to hit others and that this does not get anything. Encourage them to look for more effective ways to achieve what you want.

Make sure you understand that should apologize for their actions. At first his apology is not sincere, but when you understand that your attitude towards others is not correct his apology will make sense to him.

Premia its good performance. Get their attention when he misbehaves is normal, but it is also advisable to congratulate him when he behaves appropriately.

Limits number of hours watching television. While there are programs especially designed for children there are others who are not, those programs very aggressively can be harmful. Try to monitor what they watch on television.

Do not be afraid to ask for help, sometimes aggressiveness becomes a big problem that is necessary to seek professional help.

2012-08-22

How to avoid a child to say bad words? How to prevent children insult, What to do when children curse?

How to avoid a child to say bad words?

how_to_avoid_a_child_to_say_bad_words

In the life of every child can be a time when you start using profanity. As parents often do not, many of them are shocked and react desperate, not knowing how to handle the situation. Here are some tips for prevent children say bad words.

Vocabulary rude in children

Whence and why they learn?

One very important thing that parents obviated when their children start insult and say profanity is that children are not born with that vocabulary, or with none. This means, first, that they must have heard those words in any context, but not exactly the home or direct talks with them. Needless to diagnose that frequents places, so that we know what the origin of repetition.

Second, observe when and why he uses little. Children often use bad words as a reason of grace, knowing that it is forbidden provokes a hilarious and repeated pleasure to see the faces of their parents' astonishment. They are acts of mischief, basically not unhealthy. In these cases, it is best to explain what the meaning and connotation of these words. Generally, losing that sense of mystery, children stop using them.

However, sometimes the children are using that vocabulary rude because they need to express anxieties, frustrations, fears, anger who have been trapped in them and do not know how to communicate.

Here is worth the same, a good conversation with the child, offering the possibility of using other alternatives. There are words or phrases in our language that have the same expressive load and are not rude (gee, gosh, wow, etc.). Eye: the most important thing here is to know what is happening to the child. It is not enough to express better if left behind discontent and aggression, which is then expressed otherwise.

Managing the use of bad language by age
 
Toddlers

Young children the best solution is to ignore them. If you do not react, probably will not use the bad word again. Another variation is to transform the word that told a similar normal usually emphasize this.

Schoolchildren

In this age school children already know what they mean and what bad words provoke reaction. Often try to test the limits. Very importantly, stay calm and serenity. What more awaits your child is that you skids and alarm reactions. Instead, explain why you can not use those words, that some people do but that children should not use them.

While it is difficult to prevent children say profanity It is not impossible at all. Use the advice you have offered and, above all, stay calm and be consistent. If you handle the situation well the problem will disappear gradually.

How to prevent children insult

It's a rather embarrassing situation when we are with our children and children insult someone, Either from another child or an adult. It is important not to let ignore this situation and we talk to our children about it, otherwise it could become a habit very difficult to change. So today we will look at some tips for how to prevent children insult.

Educating by example is the most important advice we give. What children learn at home then repeated everywhere, and it is crucial not to listen at home profanity or insult others, even jokingly.

Curious Kids

Children often do not really know that they are somehow attacking someone, like when they say: "Look mom's nose that gentleman!" Or "Look at that ugly dad is that lady". In these situations they are not intentionally insulting, but are expressing and sharing their curiosity. In these cases, if we find that the person has listened, we quickly offer an apology and tell our son who will talk about this later.

When we get home we calmly explain that we all have different appearances, and that while the look of someone can get our attention, we should not point this out because it can be offensive.

Insulting may seem funny

Sometimes children have learned on TV or any other children and perhaps offensive insult seems he's saying something funny. In these cases we must tell you that what you just said is an insult and should not to repeat these words in any field.

The way to deal with the situation will be different depending on the age of your child. If your child is 4 or 5 years and is able to understand when you say that was rude, which has hurt the other person, and not to use such expressions.

For older children, generally already know what are the words that could be offensive and therefore should not say them to anyone. If your child has insulted someone ask first why you have, then explain that his attitude was not appropriate and that made you angry, finally reversed the situation and ask how you would feel if someone insulted.

Talk to your children about

No matter the age of the child, the dialogue is always the best way to address such problems, it is the only way you will understand why children should not have this kind of attitude. If you yell or punish them without giving any explanation, will not understand that their behavior was not appropriate.

Punishing a good disciplinary action Should such occurrences, but remember always give an explanation, but the punishment will be useless because they will not learn anything from it.

What to do when children curse

Nothing worse than listening to our son swearing. Sure you hold your head every time you feel your child is cursing ... Where have learned these things?, You wonder. But rather than despair, best to act. Learn with us what to do when children curse.

Do not be surprised

Honestly, if you're a new mother feel more than appalled and lost against this kind of attitude of the children. But you need to understand how simple or slightly unusual for this behavior. It is better to take it as naturally as possible to loosen tensions and explain things through dialogue.

Parents lead by example

Are you a good role model? Yes, of course. Surely it is more important to question and berate small when they start cursing. But ... Have you thought if you behave well enough in front of them?

The younger children tend to repeat what they hear, so perhaps the source of the problem can be you as a parent. Be careful with the repeat words in front of them.

Find out why

If you managed to go undefeated the previous step, you will know for sure that you are not responsible for this strange attitude. But who or what is? Even such everyday acts such as watching TV or playing on a square causes the child to interact with people of different manners. While you can not control 100% of the links, you must be as careful as possible.

Explain the meaning of words

As we said, repetition is the most common. But their age does not always allow them to think what exactly is being said. Explain the rude and disrespectful behavior that is adapting to repeat "bad words". This will help the child to think twice before doing violence verbally.

Browse the source of your emotions

Perhaps the need to download "rage" in others is due to a problem that has not been able to ascertain. Try to create different words they can use when they feel they must say something.

2012-08-16

How to instruct the children effectively? 5 tips on positive discipline and 6 tips to avoid fights between brothers

6_tips_to_avoid_fights_between_brothers


How to instruct the children effectively?

Everyone has there ever been such a situation where ask a child to do a task becomes an impossibility. And while the causes can be many, the truth is that often we have the best way to achieve be understood. Not necessarily a child should know verbal codes of the instructions we give. Therefore, these should be expressed so that the children can understand. Here are some recommendations for instruct children effectively.
 
Achieve childcare

Before giving an instruction to a child is very important to attract attention. Keep to no more than 30 inches so you can hear your voice at a normal and calm tone. Your child should understand that you are talking. You can get his attention by saying his name or looking him straight in the eyes.
 
Be clear and concise

It is important to go straight to the point and give short instructions. The fewer words you use, the better. Remember that children are always learning to talk, so many words make it difficult to understand the message. The instructions should be clear and concise, unambiguous.

Give one direction at a time

Never give your child a task list. In these cases, children may forget what they have been asked, not understanding or simply feel overwhelmed. It is better to give one instruction at a time.
 
Being realistic

Best when we ask our child to do a task is to be realistic. Do not give orders to know that the child can not keep. There are a number of activities that a little one can not do so as the saying goes: "Do not ask for the impossible." The instructions should be on the basis of those tasks and the child has achieved.
 
Be positive

It is better to tell the child what we want to do and not what you do not want. When you tell a child not doing any specific activities ("do not jump"), many other options left open (running, jumping, etc..). Instead, the be positive and say what we expect from him ("please walk") are giving the only alternative.

Do not ask but that

Do not ask your child to do a task, instead, tell him in a firm voice and friendly as you would have done. Do not say: "Would you like to pick up your toys?". This means that the child has an alternative. Better to say directly: "pick up your toys, please." Always remember to treat it well.
 
Rewarding good behavior

Once the child meets his instructions, is great praise for doing the right thing. The more reward good behavior of smaller, these are repeated in the future.

Remember that often the way we address our children threaten the effectiveness of instruction. Follow the recommendations given and we are confident that your little slowly will learn to follow the rules and do their jobs effectively.

5 tips on positive discipline

Positive discipline or gentle discipline is an approach to this aspect of parenting that seeks to lead the children of non-punitive and respectful ways, validating their emotions and helping with behavioral difficulties who have without penance or cries. Today we bring you five tips on positive discipline with young children to help you deal with minor conflicts every day.

1. "Let's try again"
Use this phrase when your child forget to thank, apologize, when he hits the little brother or answers rudely. Give a chance to try again to make your best action is a gentle and respectful way to teach and remind you how things are done. If you restore directly for not doing things right, the learning opportunity is lost.

2. To make things work: go to them when they ask for something.
Shout an order from the other end of the house does not work. If you need to ask your child to do something (to order their toys, hang up your coat, pick your shoes) squatting at its height to look into his eyes and make sure you listen. And do not forget that small children can not perform many activities simultaneously. Asking you to keep your blocks in a box is more specific and tell you more results than "orders across the room."

3. Getting it together
Young children love to be with their parents. Are naturally dependent. So you do not have to forget that and you should get involved in activities. "We will raise these toys", "Let's hang our coats" are phrases that will avoid conflicts. Be playful: instead of yelling going to brush their teeth: see what's there in a heartbeat.

4. Distractions
The little ones are curious: they learn when they explore. Many times this is inconvenient we exploratory attitude, but you should avoid it. If your son takes something that you do not want to grip, remember not to let first things you do not want to be available to them in his sight, and secondly, an environment that promotes itself to explore. There are many things you can poke a home to learn. Take it to them, distract him from where you do not want it to go out and challenge him and let it flow exploration.

5. Keep in mind the age and stage of development that your child is found
The little children have tantrums. Preschoolers can not stay still long. The seven-year defiantly respond because they are learning to be assertive. These steps are not easy, but are normal in their development. Do not take these reactions personally and behaviors: they are not acting against you. Take these opportunities to teach other ways that are more acceptable to react, and remember that no stage lasts forever.

6 tips to avoid fights between brothers

Fights between siblings are a challenge for any parent. Although we have strategies to use at the time, we all wondered how to prevent fights from happening repeatedly.

Be a good role model

Children imitate the behaviors they see in their parents. If we want to encourage kindness and peaceful behavior in our children we must first be honest about our own ways to deal with frustration, anger or fatigue. Take a moment to consider whether some attitudes you see in your children, constantly complain, grumble, insutar not listen to the other, yelling or talking with sarcasm is something you usually do and set a goal to change it.
 

Watch your tone of voice

When you lose patience with your children or argue with your partner, do you raise your voice? A very useful tip is to pay attention to the use of own voice for a few days. You will see that when the screams fall, children tend to be otherwise with his brothers not being impulsive or sudden imitating.

Stimulates kindness

Introduces a new family rule for both children and adults ever order anything saying "please" and thank all with a "thank you". So avoid conflicts between children when one takes a toy to another, or goes over their stuff, or pushing the run. At first you'll have to remind them of the rule with kindness again and again, but eventually naturalize children being polite to their brothers and denature the unkind treatment.
 
Encourages empathy

When a child hurts another, or make a mistake, try to avoid shouting, challenge or blame. Instead put the focus on empathizing with the injured person. Instead of saying "well, that occurs to them to fight," say "Oops! That blow must have hurt! Let's give a mime "encouraging brother to comfort him. Children connect with empathy when the models.

Be affective

In families that specifically demonstrates affection with hugs, and the habit of saying to the other "I love you" or "I care about you" every day, the brothers learn to care for and valued and have fewer fights rather abrupt.
 
Reward kindness

When you see your children share their toys, helping each other with homework or just playing together, congratulate them and show them all how happy they are when they get along and help.

All these tips will help make your home a more peaceful and brotherly relationship between your children, more careful and gentle.

2012-08-15

Children who bite: how to deal with it? How do you handle the biting?

children-that-bite
Children who bite: how to deal with it?

Children who begin walking often lovable give hugs, smiles graciously ... However, also may bite, Embarrassing if seen from a social point of view. And although many parents take comfort in that is just a childhood phase, actually that is not true in all cases. It is therefore important to learn strategies to curb this childish behavior.
 
Why children bite?

Incredibly, biting is a normal part of early development of every child. Babies and young toddlers just bite for various reasons ranging from the process dentition to exploring objects with their mouths. When they learn about cause and effect, often try to bite people to get a reaction.

Biting can also be a way to find the child to get attention or express their feelings. The frustration, the anger and fear are very strong emotions and the little ones do not have the resources to deal with them. Therefore, it is a language to say "I am here" or simply "I do not like."

Behavior is more common in men from 1 to 2 years and tends to disappear as you learn other communication skills.

How to curb the bites of children?

The next time your child bites someone follow these steps:

Consolation first victim

Direct your attention to the person who has been bitten, Especially if another child. You should not be observed, first because the wrong behavior for the enhanced. Remember that the biter wants attract attention. If there has been an injury, disinfects wounded area with soap and water. Then apply ice.
 
Stay calm and firm

Go to your child firmly saying, "You should not bite!" or "Biting hurts". Use a simple sentence the little one can understand. Make it clear that biting is bad but no explanation can not yet understand. The more calmly reactions, the faster it will solve the problem.
 
Consolation the biter if needed

It often happens that children who are just walking not understand that biting hurts. Is it right to comfort a child if you feel guilty for hurting his friend.

Offers alternatives

When all is calm, suggests alternatives that are through wordsFor example: "No", "Stop," "It's mine," to communicate with others.
 
Diverts attention

The distractions work wonders in this age group. If the energy levels and emotions are very high already, or there is boredom, directs attention to other newer activities: Singing, dancing, coloring or other game.

If the above steps do not resolve, can be effective pause: Takes the child to a place far away for a minute and was calm.

The punishment usually not necessary at this age because bite is normal and many do not understand that are causing harm to others. But he remembers be firm and carry out each of the steps above, is an excellent way to better educate your child.
 
How do you handle the biting? 
 
What-do-with-the-bite
 
Almost all children go through a stage of childhood in which bites part of their lives. It sometimes happens that they want to bite, and can hurt another child. And sometimes it can happen that they are bitten, perhaps by a smaller sibling or a classmate in kindergarten. In either case, there are things you should do to handle the situation whatever.

On the one hand, you take charge when your child is who has caught the habit of biting. You watch, and at times you see it going to do it again, using the voice stronger than you and tell not bite others. If you have more than 9 months and is in old enough to understand.

When it is larger and continues to do so, you should get you thinking about how bad it is acting. This may help a little "penance". No need to miss hours sitting in a corner for most of the small few minutes are sufficient. And next time I will do, may remember that what you will not be as fun.

And if not, is your child who appears with a bite that has given another, be sure wash with soap and water as soon as possible. You do not even skin wound. And if it is, especially if it bleeds a little Rub some antibiotic product and put a bandage. Then checks that no signs of infection. If you see the bite area becomes inflamed or draining, maybe you should take him to a doctor.

How to deal with bossy children, How to deal with children and teasing

How_to_deal_with_bossy_children

How to deal with bossy children

Temperament and personality of each child is unique. In the preschool years especially, can be given that children with more assertive and dominant personalities become bossy with other children their age, requiring them to do in every game, demanding that things be done his way through group games at home with siblings and with peers in the garden, and even to ask for things their parents.

These small plaintiffs are challenging and help us to consider how to socialize in ways more enjoyable.

Be patient

One reason that children can be dominant and bossy is because they are imitating that kind of behavior. Although adults who must make decisions in every home, sometimes offer little options or alternatives to make them feel more in control (such as choosing what tea cup, for example) will make them feel less the need to control. Be patient and try to guide your child to learn to ask for things gently without forcing others to please, while you honor your ability to express what they want and need.

Ask behavioral changes

Do not be afraid to remind your preschooler to be use their manners when someone asks for something, and that forcing behavior and demand are not friendly to both the play, share an activity or to the need for help with something. Use "please" never hurts and should not be forgotten.

Give the choice in some respects

When we give children the opportunity to experience a small sense of control over aspects according to their abilities and age, we can reduce their need to be bossy and demanding. Choose from one color or another shirt, or sit on either side of the car to leave options are small children makes them feel the satisfaction of choosing within a realistic scope and chord.

Involve teachers and caregivers

If you suspect that your child's bossy attitude is manifested also in kindergarten, involves teachers to help you monitor the situation and use a strategy similar to yours to guide you toward more enjoyable ways to relate to others, so as not to affect the bond with their peers.

Reverse the situation

When your child begins to give orders to others, remove it from the situation and talk to him. Ask him what his friends would feel if forced to do what they wanted, and you learn to have a record of the impact it can have on their games.

Teach how to relate

Modeling good manners at home: instead of giving orders screaming when you need to order their toys or take a bath, ask to gentilieza and kindness. Children imitate the manners that are represented around. If your child begins to give orders and be bossy, correct at the time giving alternative words to use.

Explain that sometimes things do not go our way

Your little one will learn that sometimes we have to hear "no" answer, and that's natural. If your brother or friend will not play the game that he proposes, it has the right to choose something else and your child must learn to accept it. Guide him and remind these guidelines when you see situations arising before the adoption of a bossy and controlling attitude when things do not go as he expected.

Congratulate you when you use good manners

When the child use appropriate ways to ask for something to others without being bossy, nótalo and make him a comment. Probably help you get increasingly adopting these attitudes rather kind of wanting to control.

How to deal with children and teasing 

How_to_deal_with_children_and_teasing

The teasing among children not an unusual situation. Among siblings in school and in the park, children tease are a frequent conflict. These situations can result in harassment or bullying and affect self-esteem children fooled.
 
Teasing in Children
 
Why do they occur?

When young children learn to express verbally, sometimes find that some words create reactions in others but do not know how to measure the consequences. Teasing also occur in children whose households teasing and sarcasm are common, or in children who watch television programs where they see these situations, and naturally imitate.

What to do if your child is teased

Let him know you understand how you feel. Empathy is very important, and make your child feel that you know not having a good time when it is teased and it will help you deal with it as much ease.

Encourage him to defend himself. Knowing you can learn to set boundaries and tell someone else who does not like to be treated with derision will be important to your personal assessment.

Encourage him to ask for help when you need an adult nearby.

Make sure there teasing at home among brothers. Let him know that teasing is not acceptable in any area and seek to foster an environment of respect.

Create an environment of respect and restraint at home. It will be important for self-esteem knowing that you have a place to be valued and cared: it will give strength to fend off the taunts and its effect.

What to do if your child fun

Pay attention to the negative influences at home, among adults and among siblings. Sarcasm, irony and contempt among parents, from parents to children and between siblings, they can repeat these behaviors outside the home, especially in children who receive them at home.

Try to understand why this behavior occurs. Sometimes the children repeat the taunts that have been in another place, some other games, family friends, a brother. You should be aware of your child's social interactions and conversations with him.

Explain why circumvent hurts others. Be taught from childhood to children about respecting the feelings of others: in particular it must be modeled at home, with parents examples of respect and empathy for their children.

Discuss the importance of respecting differences and integration. Maybe your child to be seen how other children tease someone who is different. But if your child learns from home that differences should be honored and respected, not integrated into the behavior and may be a model of integration and sympathy among their peers.

What to do if they fight: Fights of children: should we intervene?

What_to_do_if_they_fight_Fights_of_children_should_we_intervene
Many parents wonder whether we should intervene in the conflicts of our children for two years with other children. The modus operandi depend on the situation in which it is the child.

We are in doubt as: when and when not to intervene? How? Why or why not? We tell you how you act when your child fights with other children in the most common.

They want the same toy

John is playing quietly in the park with his bucket and shovel. Suddenly, another boy comes and takes away the shovel. A John does not make an iota of grace and tries to wrench.
Intervene? Not

In principle, no. At this age the fights are not usually serious and with a little time, children solve their own conflicts. But not always. If the fight for the same toy reaches the hands and becomes a ruthless struggle, then feel free to step in to separate them and protect them. In the second part of the intervention can take a mediating role, ie Enfold them in seeking an agreement that satisfies both. What if one is left with the shovel and the other with the bucket?

Pinch his brother in secret

And when you find out you drop the heart sink. Do you do that so terrible shoot his brother? A hidden! You thought that the jealousy were a thing of the past ... Do you like you have not seen anything or you AFEAS their behavior?
Intervene? Yes

The opportunity gives the pinch is to understand the fears and needs that lead your child to interact well with their brother. No serious or awful, simply expresses something that fails to digest. Without scoldYou can tell what you have seen and talk about what happens. Your intervention is intended to protect the child and transmit security.

It touches everything in the supermarket

Luis has fun in the super. It is dedicated to passing their hands on as many surfaces as possible. If you are tough enough to caress him, some were caught and thrown into the car, if they are soft, like bread or bananas, enjoys squeezing the fingers. Her mother glances, not sure if is right or wrong, but if I had to go all the time scolding never end making the purchase.
Intervene? Yes

Although he never scolding. The child touches all those things guided by a healthy boost of learning, which in this case conflicts with respect to property of another. Recognizing his desire to learn, you can explain that the shop owners do not like to touch his things, and then offer an alternative to meet your need: give to explore the products you getting into the car and take Suggest another some himself. So, accept their need for handling and learning while you teach there standards related to respect the things of others.

Do not share things

And no way. Silvia is surrounded by his wrists and when your friends come with her daughter to spend the afternoon there is no way that you leave anything Silvia. The more you insist, the worse it gets the thing ...
Intervene? Not

It is important to recognize their right not to share. Are your things, not yours, and you must respect the child. This has nothing to do with selfishness, is a simple act of reassurance. If your girlfriend wants to play, let them understand, but do not force him to share. If behavior is repeated always, you can tell how well it goes a share and give example. If you do not want to share is a common good then it should intervene. Explain that belongs to all, show that other children enjoy and want to negotiate a way to share the swing.

It has a huff

Carmen does not know where to go when Laura drops to the floor screaming in the middle of the street. "If nothing happened," he says Carmen. He has tried everything from the smallest to reason with him a couple of good cries, but nothing works. Sometimes the leaves scream until he gets tired. But it can take so long to get tired ...
Intervene? Not

Intervention is not necessary, but accompany. Or rather, accompanying intervene. Although not understand his reasons, tantrums are an expression of rage you should not block. Must accompany the child to not hurt when you hug and permits, supporting you to move beyond that state of mind.

You stuck in the nursery

One day Daniel woke up grumpy. Also the next and the next. "Cole, no," became the slogan morning. His mother asked the teacher if Daniel had any problems. This told him that a partner had taken a little with him, but they were "childish things" and not to worry. The resistance of Daniel to go to the nursery grew and her mother could not do.
Intervene? Yes

Our son is going wrong, though apparently not important, and we give you tools to avoid it. Talk to the teacher and with him. It is important to express what happens, and you will feel relief and support. You can ask directly and share any stories related to the topic. You should also teach protected. It hurts to talk to the teacher. If something is going to significantly alter our son, it's good that your "sign" to know, you may be missing information.

Paste in the nursery

Ricardo is the child who sticks to Daniel, his fellow nursery, One every other day too. Your mother is ashamed of complaints from the teacher, but do not know what to do. When Richard asks if it hits, he always says no.
Intervene? Yes

Excessive aggressiveness informs you that something is wrong. One thing is that sometimes when you release the hand and quite another to hit consistently. It is important to locate you and, in parallel show to express his anger or disagreement of any other way. How to intervene? The purpose of your participation is not inhibit aggressive behavior, but to know what happens to the child who makes manifest so violently. It is also important to teach a different way of expressing his aggression. Although only having two years, can explain the consequences of their actions. If you need support to find out what the child alters can always go to a professional to help you locate the problem and fix it.

2012-08-12

A complete guide to games and toys

Toys that are safe for children, Eight toys are safe for children

Just before Christmas the demand for toys is greatly increased. It is a magical time, filled with light, color, parties, family dinners and gifts, but can also be risks.

Not all toysprovide the same safeguards for children. It is important to know the main features expected of a toy that is safe for children, and how features vary by product and age of the child.

Safety standards for toys are dictated by the European Union, and last modified on 20 July 2011. As we approach the holiday season should be remembered the most important points of this law:
toys

The toy safety

The best toy not always the most demanded by children. Sure, one must respect and consider their tastes, desires, but it is important that parents provide security for their children. It is important that to buy a toy, Parents read carefully the description of the game, observe what is done, and advise how to use the most appropriate toy.

The toys that violate safety standards, when used by children, may provoke asphyxia by the presentation of small parts, intoxication by inhalation of certain chemicals in paints and other materials, burns by some flammable materials, etc..

Generally speaking, violations of safety standards, often affect the design and construction, flammability, electrical safety, magnets, and the content of toxic substances, especially those imported from countries like China.

From now on we can be a little easier when it comes to toy safety, because the new law requires manufacturers to always include information on the place of manufacture, batch number and product ... and forcing committed to strict testing laboratories or agencies.

Thanks to the joint action of the European Union standards and proper supervision by parents, this year we can enjoy a quieter Christmas, always respecting the limits of recommended age of toys and instructions thereof. What are you waiting to write your letter to Santa Claus?.

Healthy Habits for children through toys

What are the current problems of children? How to deal with problems such as childhood obesity? What are some children need to receive a early stimulation? The answers to these questions can be found in two manuals that have just been published by the Research Association of Toy Industries .

With the first, "Games, toys and childhood obesity" is intended to prevent problems such as the childhood obesity, Creating healthy habits in childhood. Of what it is to apply the advances made by the toy industry to very child in society today. The second guide, "Games, toys and Early Intervention," provides information, advice and recommendations from the standpoint of early intervention for businesses to adapt, innovate and design new games and toys in order to not only prevent problems , as well as encourage the development and growth, and stimulation.
toys

Both a guide like the other meet with a social function that links educational problems, social and health with the use of games and toys. 
 
The guides, conducted a lengthy investigation by a team of experts, are aimed at parents, childhood experts, as well as manufacturers toys. Be released for free with a print run of one thousand copies. The association also offers some videos that teach, in stages, to stimulate babies and children under the age they are.

The best toys for disabled children

The game encourages and stimulates the physical and cognitive development the child, so it should be a universal activity for all children regardless of age, race, nationality, physical and social condition. The toy participates in a leading role in this practice, but little is known about the most appropriate toys for children who have some disability Either visual, auditory, motor or intellectual.

"Whatever the special needs the child present, the toy must not serve its limitations, but the possibilities and interests of the child. Should reinforce what the child can do to take on challenges".

The family plays a key role, in the case of children with disabilities, bridge becomes mediator between the toy and children. They are the parents who enhance initiative the child, we encourage and respect their pace, encouraging stimulus. Parents can adapt toys for your child to enjoy and take more out of them. To help with the choiceFrom the Association, we offer some guidance.

Toys for all children, disabled or not
 
The_best_toys_for_disabled_hildren
1. For motor disabilities.Would be very interesting toys with parts fit easily, large structures that do not oblige when moving too fast. Should have easy access to their springs, keys or functions.

2. For the hearing impaired. Children with Impairment may be offered the same toys for any child: dolls, games, Skates, bicycles ... Depending on the degree of deafness of the child, we can choose toys with sound effects accompanied by vibrations, lights, movements. It's very interesting to have volume control or headphone output level to match the child's ear.

3. For visual disabilities. As in other cases, we must start with the limitation, for them it is important to facilitate the use of play and toys incorporating sound effects to parts and textures easy to identify by touch. Toys colors very bright or contrasting, who do not have small parts or Velcro, could be very stimulating.

4. For intellectual disability, the spectrum can be very broad, depending on the level. Toys for school use may be an attractive option, since they are designed to facilitate the learning.

Most importantly, for a child with a disability, is that it promotes inclusion and socialization through play with other children as well as understanding and mutual enrichment. It is very difficult to make standard games and toys for children with disabilities adjust to the specific needs and specific to each individual child, but from the Toy Manufacturers Association are committed to "Toys for All" So that when you devise and manufacture, are aware that any child can play with it. 
 
It is very complex to create toys for each specific need, but you have to provide, from all areas, the full integration and development of children, whatever their condition.

What fate give the toys that your child does not play? The fate of used toys for children

This image, photographed in the street from my house, you can draw many conclusions ... What do an elephant, a bear and a frog sitting at the foot of a post office? Who have put there? Who owned these creatures so tender? Any child who, at one point slept with them, They had their secrets or shared with them their fantasies ... Years pass, children grow, overcome stage ... and toys end up being replaced and abandoned.

Recycle or donate toys, rather than abandon
 
What_to_do_with_used_toys_for_children
Although the image awakened some tenderness, also gives a tremendous pity. It is hard to see that the stories of some movies as is the case 'Toy Story', Also replicated in real life. 
 
I understand this may seem strange that children are looking for toys, when normally seeks toys for children, Right? But in the so-called 'first world', the toys are stacked in closets, shelves, and at times like this, on the street, abandoned next to a trash container.

I know what you "think" this bear, elephant and frog. What will be your fate? As you see, who has put there, I did not throw them away. 
 
It may not have had no choice but to leave them there because maybe tried donate to an institution and was denied on the grounds that they could not accumulate to lead them to economically disadvantaged children. 
 
Sometimes I took my daughter's toys, used and in a good state of these institutions and they said they could not retain it because it was not time Toy collection. Honestly, I can not believe that happens in the world in which we live.

On the other hand, I believe who have put these stuffed animals there was careful not to mix with the trash. Perhaps he did because he has not found a special container for toys, Right? Thinking about it, I think it would be nice to have a special container, only to toys And that a utility would be responsible for recycling and lead them to children who do not have the opportunity to have a toy. That would not be bad.
 
What fate could give the toys that our children no longer play? If there is any recommendation you would like to know. Maybe other mothers and fathers too. Something better to leave them outdoors. Something that could "save" the abandonment. I think we could do much about, right? Well, let me know.

2012-08-09

Sensitive children: their emotions and feelings

Sensitivity is a quality with which it is born and who owns it, is able to relate all the facts of daily life with their senses and its emotions. The sensitivity can be understood as the ability to experience physical impressions, and this is a function that corresponds to the nerves. Is directly related to the mental process of perception and the ability to feel deeply and from this point of view the sensitivity, is connected with the affective processes.

How to recognize a sensitive child?

The_sensitivity_of_children
In children, the sensitivity is easy to recognize. They are affectionate and enjoy the personal contact and physical affection. Respond with greater sensitivity than expected to wordsand the gestureswhen they feel hurt, vibrate with the musicand related odors, colors, Aromas andflavorsexperiences or moments of everyday life.

Usually represent unusual details in their drawingsAnd surprise their parents and family for the great skill they have to evaluate people, as having a sixth sense. They are receptive to expressions of the face, eyes and jaw tension and, therefore, are able to predict what the other will do or feel. They have more empathy and tune into the emotions of another person.
From joy to sadness

Sensitive children are easily excited feeling grief, joy or love to the reading of a story, While watching a movie or when they see someone begging on the street. It deeply saddened when their parents or teachers scold them or when your best friend tells you no longer want to play with him.

What children need sensitive?

Feel loved and valued. They are especially sensitive to the love of their parents and have become quickly disciplined by predicting their anger. Connect more with their emotions, recognize and express and at the same time, to be more empathetic tend to be less aggressive with their peers and are less able to defend themselves, because when they feel hurt become immobilized and find it more difficult to answer. Instead, they can move easily into the other's place, and find it easier share and be solidarity. On the other side of the face of the coin, it is noteworthy that they are hypersensitive to criticism and social judgment. Suffer rejection of the other hard and are able to predict to easily analyze the elements of nonverbal languageSuch as body posture or tension of the jaw.

How to help a sensitive child?

Parents can reinforce and encourage this quality:

- Stimulating assertive communication. Helping to put limits on their social relationships and teaching them to say "will not".
- Helping to play down the problems or social situations not to make difficulties tragedy.
- Fostering their self-confidenceStimulating them to express their views and ideas with ease.
- Encouraging the development of strategies defense.

What to avoid with a sensitive child?
- I can not handle situations or exceeding its skills. If you have not reached sufficient maturity to deal with certain circumstances, will welcome the chance to become competent.
- Correct their mistakes in public you should not feel ashamed. It is important that you feel is valuable for the way he is and what it does.
- Reprimirle when expressing their emotions.

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